Movie Corner: The Lone Ranger

by Candace Salima on US Daily Review

6 July 2013, 06:00 a.m. CST

Movie: The Lone Ranger

Directed by: Gore Verbinski

Starring: Armie Hammer, Johnny Depp

Rating/Runtime: PG-13, 149 minutes

The Lone Ranger is a childhood hero of mine. I never missed an episode, ever. So when this movie about the Lone Ranger made it's appearance I was really excited to see it. One hundred forty nine minutes later, not so much.

The whole movie is one big flashback told by the decidedly odd Tonto played by the equally odd Johnny Depp. Armie Hammer plays the Lone Ranger, but a wimpified one. The Calvary are bad guys. The business guys are bad guys. The bad guys are REALLY bad, revolting and disgusting. And the Native Americans, they are the good guys who were picked on; not really much to do with the Lone Ranger at all.

Some of the scenes were really too graphic both in content and picture for me to watch. Bad guy eating the heart of a Ranger. Another bad guy scalping someone he'd just shot. And it goes on and on. They tried entirely too hard to make it a good story and instead made it perfectly ridiculous.

In fact, it would seem Gore Verbinski set out to completely destroy the Lone Ranger so that no one could hold his character up as a hero again. Tonto, who had great dignity in the original Lone Ranger television series, is nothing more than a ridiculous nutjob in this latest rendition. And Armie Hammer, what can I say, except for the last ten minutes of the movie, he bore no resemblance to the Lone Ranger whatsoever, not in look, motivation, or action.

I walked out of the theater thinking I might give the film 1/2 star for cinemaphotography. Alvin argued that they at least deserve one star. I allowed that the acting had been great, as had the directing, although the storyline was boring, and horrible.

Here's how it boils down. I don't recommend children see this movie. In addition, it isn't worth what a movie costs these days, in fact, I felt decidedly robbed. The Lone Ranger gets 2 out of 5 stars, and that's being generous. This is a definite thumbs down.

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Candace Salima is an author, columnist, and public speaker. She makes her home in the Rocky Mountains. Learn more about her at www.CandaceSalima.com. Follow her on Twitter, Pinterest, LinkedIn or Facebook.

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Copyright 2013. All rights reserved by Candace E. Salima.